Stop to Reset

Before launching off into a new encounter this week, take some time to reflect, regroup, and intentionally choose and prepare for a new course of action.

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Exercises

Choose Your Lift Level

What do you have capacity for today? Whether it's a light lift, or something a little heavier, taking a step is what counts.

5 minutes 15 minutes 30 minutes

5 minutes

Here Comes the Judge!

Complete the Blame Intensity Inventory.

Take this inventory and assess your tendency to blame. Then, either on a piece of paper or a device, note every time you notice yourself drawn to blame or judge - whatever the cause. You may be surprised by what you find.

Take The Inventory

The Science Behind It

Our addiction to blame and outrage is toxic and is a central part of the vicious cycle of polarization we are trapped in.

15 minutes

How Do You Derail in Conflict?

Take the Conflict Anxiety Response Scale (CARS) assessment and review your feedback report.

Take The Scale

The Science Behind It

The way we approach conflicts in our lives is strongly affected by our anxieties. These may be based on fears of our own or others' aggression getting out of control, a sense of helplessness, or concerns over the pain and discomfort conflict may bring. Experiencing higher anxiety levels makes us more inclined to experience or instigate conflict. Being engaged in conflict, in turn, tends to make most of us feel even more anxious. Many of us respond to conflict in extreme and harmful ways when this happens, stressing our closer relationships.

So, how can you get conflict right? Take the CARS. Then, reflect on how you tend to respond when anxious. Knowing yourself is the first step to changing how you respond.

30 minutes

Know (and Grow) Your Positivity-to-Negativity Ratio

Practice cultivating positivity and minimizing obstacles to constructive dialogue, or take an emotional reservoirs assessment.

The Science Behind It

One of the most powerful findings in conflict research over the last few decades is the power of our emotional ratios. That is, how our positive-to-negative experiences of others accumulate over time to grow emotional reservoirs that set the stage for our next encounters.

The relationship will likely withstand and benefit from conflict when we have high positive-to-negative ratios. However, low positive-to-negative ratios mean the stage is set for battle, no matter how minor your conflicts may be. Becoming mindful of our ratios is crucial to constructive conflict management.
So, take either or both assessments and reflect on your current positive-to-negative ratio and how you might consider changing it.

Daily Reflection

End the day by reflecting on how your intentions and past experiences with your more politically-challenged relationships can set the stage for problems or new possibilities.

Set a daily reminder

Get daily exercise reminders on your phone or email throughout The Challenge to stay on track.

Better navigate politically polarizing situations

Repair strained relationships with family and friends

Become a less reactive and more effective communicator